Porn, Reality TV and Valentine's Day.

I'm a little late, but you know, fuck it. Happy Valentine's Day y'all. To celebrate this, I've thrown in a few photos of my most epic V-day ever. It happened in the dead of winter in Budapest, while I was on exchange. It was my 3rd weekend in this almost terrifyingly foreign country where I did not speak the language, had next to no friends, and was still acclimatizing myself to the -10 temperature.

Isabella's favoritest  Valentine's Day so far.

I did however have one friend, Wright, who is this chaotic Dutch guy that had a tendency to oversleep and collect random crap from the street to make art. He was living in this flat on the opposite end from mine on Király ut. His landlord was a Hungarian guy called Imre. Apparently I had bumped into him at the university on registration day and we had locked stares for an uncomfortably long amount of time. Which is just the way a good stare at a another individual you find sexually attractive should be. Also, I had given both Wright and Imre rather lame ass lap dances about a week ago after dinner in their flat. (I was extremely drunk, and at that point I hadn't developed the ability to keep my clothes on when fucked up. I have marginally better control of this behaviour now).

He managed to get my phone number from Wright and called me up one day while I was coming back from the gym to ask if I wanted to meet up for a bottle of wine. I told him I was definitely game, and that we could meet outside my apartment block. 

Of course I knew what the whole visit was about, so to cut to the chase, I invited him in, we had the wine and did the dirty. It wasn't that great the first time, which was disappointing, but he had like this sexy, worked out body, which made mediocre first-time sex forgivable. His excuse was that he was on flu meds. My secret belief (after taking into consideration certain events that were to transpire later) is that he liked me a lot; and sometimes some guys have this thing where they can't perform at their best until they get more comfortable, if they like you a lot. Or that it was just him needing to be a bit more familiar with a girl first, which is also normal. But for the fact that he gave out this total playboy image. Actually it wasn't an image, it was a fact.

We were rolling around in bed and he asked me if I wanted to do anything for the rest of the night.

Me "Keep fucking?"
Him "For sure. But I feel like I want to go out and do something."

Me "You know, I was invited to this Porno shoot out in District 23, where ever the hell that is but I didn't think I'd go because it's fucking cold and I have no idea how to get there."
Him "I know where it is. It's far out. We can drive there."
Me "Sounds good. Yeah, I don't think it would be that interesting, but it's going to be weird, and you know what runs freely on every porn set..."
Him "Would be good. For sure we are going then."

So I packed myself into my fur lined puffer coat which I wore permanently whenever I was outdoors until March arrived, and bundled into his car. I told him how I got this peculiar invite: One of T's friends had seen my status on Facebook as "Gallivanting in Budapest" or something to a similar effect and had asked T to contact me about this porn reality TV he was shooting and ask if I wanted to come or not. They needed extras.

It was one of the weirdest nights in my life, and I've had some pretty weird nights. But it was possibly the coldest night I had in Hungary, about -21, I had just gotten laid with a fit local boy who seemed to like me quite a bit, and now we were driving out into the housing estates which looked like how a housing estate would look anywhere in the world (square concrete blocks) including Singapore. Only it was freezing and starting to snow, the atmosphere was saturated with black, and the estate looked pretty damn shady. Imre told me these were dangerous parts. I was worried when he got out to ask this random poor sod waiting for the bus for directions.

After much confusion, we managed to find this place. It was really something else. It was this big ass house with white washed walls and a jacuzzi in the living room in the middle of suburbia. I guess Hungary has its own San Pornando Valley, but it's no where as glitzy as the one in California. It was fucking grim. Later, I talked to the woman that owned the place. She was a very nice, smart lady, and she was in the business of porn real estate. She bought places and turned them into pimped up porn mansions. Interesting business indeed.

We got out and I met Dave, the guy that invited me to this thing and we had a good chat about porn and Dorothy Parker. Among other things. Actually I liked most of the guys making the film, they were just regular guys, and most of them were probably way over-skilled for the job they were doing. The guys that were IN the porn film however were a different story. They weren't porn stars apparently, they had paid to be in this shoot. It was like a 'porn holiday'. Something Hungary and other central-eastern European countries and the Baltic states specialize in.

They started filming the thing and it got quite boring soon enough. The girls didn't seem to be really enjoying it, and the guys just seemed to be on viagra or something. I was like, so not horny the whole time I was there. However, after drinking copious amounts of whiskey cokes, I started to get into the swing of things and at some point found myself with my top off and fondling silicone boobies.

He was obviously having a hilarious time too...

This was basically what was going on in the background: quite typical huh.

That was pretty much the most memorable V-Day every. It's the way I like it yeah.